Things My Dad Used To Say...

 My dad, Gene, passed away Oct 26, 1991. He's been gone a long time now and I am older now than he was when he passed. Cathy's dad Bill has only been gone 4 years and I had the time to know what he thought about everything so sometimes when I'm in a situation I wonder, "what would Bill do?" I'm left to wonder what my dad would have thought about this or that in the world today so to help me make my way I recall some of the things my dad used to say.

 Keep reading at your own risk because my dad used profanity. He didn't cuss the family but it was often said he liked his job because he could cuss and rear to his hearts delight. 

 

"How in the hell did that get like that?" Usually used when observing a tangled fishing rod. I use the expression in almost any situation. 

"Did he take it plumb out of sight." A question when bobber fishing for him to determine how good a bite you got. I ask my wife this all the time when we are on the lake. 

"Is he trying to run under the boat with it?" An attempt by my dad to determine how hard the fish you were fighting was pulling. I still use this. 

"It could outrun the stink of it's own a##." Occasionally used when describing the muscle cars of the 60s and early 70s but most often used to refer to some one speeding down the river with a 20hp boat motor. I wonder what my dad would think of the 200 and 300hp models common today. There's plenty of people trying to outrun it.  

"Couldn't stick a finger in his a## with both hands. An inept person usually one with a college degree. Used because though he had practical engineering knowledge his formal schooling only went to the 8th grade.  I have a college degree, my wife has a degree, my brother has a degree, most people I know have one and some of his grandchildren have college degrees. We might could convince him to change his mind.  

"Whatever she wore you had to be able see up it, down it or through it." Comment on women's fashion. 

"Giving it an enema" When you see a neighbor working on his car and requiring a combination greater than 3 of hood, trunk or doors open at any one time. 

"I'm getting to where I can't see." After a day of fishing when the evening shadows grew long with great ceremony my dad would remove the clip on sunglasses from his bifocals and say this. It was a signal that he was ready to go home. Once when drinking beer and fishing with my friends I told them about this and as they got more inebriated they began exclaiming this. I use my dad's old tackle box for my saltwater gear. Those clip ons are in there. Since my prescription sunglasses are several scrips old I am actually getting to where I can't see to tie a hook on with them so I may start with the clip ons and day now. 

"This is the day they pave the bottom of the lake with beer cans." My dad said this on holiday weekends. He was referring to weekend pleasures cruisers whom he expected to overcrowd the water, the parking lots, drink beer and litter. In modern times I often go to the lake on holiday weekends because that's when my family has days off and it certainty does not seem as busy as a weekend when I was a kid. It's possible that people are not outside as much and I'm not on the part of the lake that hosts big time bass fishing or maybe my dad just wanted a long weekend in the easy chair.      

    

Once when my son was little he told me, "you are not like other dads." That's another story but I think it's safe to say no dad is like another dad.