Under a Mushroom Cloud...

So you remember that? Most of you are like me, full, spitting up middle age angst, still tortured by thoughts that we would be safe if we did as instructed and hid under our desks at school (treachery, they always hit while we are busy) in case of atomic attack. I don't really recall all that, a little too young. I do know from a quick thumbing of my Texas Field Guide to Mushrooms that does not help me identify this fine fall specimen I found in my yard this morning but seems to indicate a family that if eaten would make me wish a bomb would go off to relieve me from it's toxic effects.

You do know that nuclear strategy is a science, studied and practiced in the 1940s, 50s, 60s, 70s by skinny unnamed men in suits with cold eye glass frames. The falling of the Wall did nothing to retire this profession. Only difference now is that the men are fat, unaware that they have become too slow and gouty on a diet of organ meats (brain salad, kidney pie, spleen soup and fried liver, we are back to toxic effects) to lumber to the safe hidden bunker. So they stay above ground heavy lidded eyes barely open, "we are interested in stability" they say to newcomers to their grand game.

So if you had to sit across the table from these men, disgusting, both their science and their choice of snacks what would you do? Pull out iphones, twitter, "Hiroshima, Nagasaki, no reply, Tokyo still intact?"