Would things be simpler if...

I was a non-filtered cigarette smoking accordion player in Romania? If I liked rock music from the 80s? If the President really was a Christian? If I did not know how to drive a car? If I did not know how to play a guitar? If breakfast this morning was green eggs and ham? If I was in New Orleans for Jazz Fest this weekend? If I did not wake up at 3:30am? If I knew what that Mexican boy said when I walked through his hog pen way out in the jungle that time? If my ears weren't ringing? If I hadn't said the N word so loud that time so long ago? If friends never got sick? If I had never learned to copy and paste? If I just made this stuff up? If I read other blogs? If I was sedated? If I was incarcerated? If I always had super glue when I needed it? If technology really was my friend? If I really got everything I wanted? If I wasn't free? If auto parts stores keep a ready supply of parts for 25 year old imports? If the brain was smooth instead of wrinkled?

I'm blowing off steam, add your own stuff to the list...